botanyshitposts:

spideymoth:

botanyshitposts:

botanyshitposts:

every time I start thinking about lepidodendrons I always end up thinking about what it would be like to Jurassic Park one back to life and settle the 10099880 questions about how they existed once and for all

redwoods reach about 370 feet on average. after some consideration, i have decided that in comparison a theoretical 100 foot tall Lep wouldn’t be like, terrible. i propose the construction of a 150 foot tall greenhouse mimicking carboniferous-age conditions, with heat and a pumped-in swamp environment at the bottom being top priority. we also would need to find an arborist willing to help care for a 100 foot tall monstrosity. i suspect that fungus would be a problem, because lepidodendrons were around and living it up in a hot, wet environment before common molds evolved (this is why their remnants were allowed to be pressed into coal instead of degraded into the environment like trees today), so theoretically this would need to be a sterile greenhouse, unless the modern Isoetes genes would provide some protection.

there is also the problem of how they do not know how to be plants and will die as soon as they 1. reproduce or 2. run out of space for vascular tissues at the far ends of their branches, meaning that this thing WILL come down and it WILL come down hard. for this reason i also propose making the sterile greenhouse 300 feet in both width and length in addition to 150 feet tall so it has space to die with some dignity. after being hosed down in the series of 15 airlocks, visitors to the forbidden domain will enter 2 at a time to protect against the off chance of the lepidodendron turning against us in a way we foolishly overlooked while playing god, but it should be noted that if it really does attack that the presence of a single other person would do nothing to stop it, and the sterilization procedure moments before would have removed humanity’s only large-scale weapon. for this purpose i propose it remain conspicuously chained to a comically large steel pole at all times

idk how to tell you this but there is one single remaining genus of descendants from Lepidodendrons and that’s Isoetes, which are several inches tall and have anatomy so incredibly wack there are still tissues and organs of theirs that we do not understand the function of. this is because when the continents split at the end of the carboniferous period, the lep swamps started to dry up and evolution started to select against the 100+ foot tall Chonkers, so only the smaller family members survived. this has resulted in that 100+ foot tall woody trunk being reduced into a 1 inch tall woody corm with anatomically ‘simple’ leaves and roots and it literally just looks like a grass, but do not be fooled. Isoetes has been baffling scientists for centuries, and anyway the point of this is that yes, you too can purchase a mini eldritch horror masquerading as a typical aquatic grass, but they’re mostly sold as either 1. teaching aids for science classes/experiments and 2. aquarium decor. 

imagine being the sole descendant of a 400 million year old lineage that used to dominate the prehistoric landscape. diversifying. surviving the continents splitting. paleontologists find the fossils of your ancestors in ancient riverbeds. there are still about 200 species worldwide today. in the 80s and 90s there was a discovery about your photosynthesis so weird that the paper describing it was initially rejected from multiple major journals because the editors deemed it impossible and ridiculous. scientists are confused and enamored and hold entire symposiums dedicated to you. an international research group has been assembled.

and you are available for purchase for $15.25. the site lists you as a good choice for aquariums and ships you in a plastic bag